Halloween in Night Vale
by featherkitten
Summary: Cecil narrates what is happening at Night Vale during Halloween.


"Listen to my voice, let it soothe you. Let it distract you from the endless void above our heads which may or not be making noises. Welcome to Night Vale.

Its that time of year again. The time where a select amount of us, shred our corporeal from and slip into something more comfortable. A time when we stock up on blood stones and let our children dress up as what we foolishly believe to be monsters. The real monsters are ourselves of course. It is Halloween.

The dark void in the sky is making a scratching noise. No, the scratching is coming from inside it. But its so close, so very close. You can hear it, you can almost feel it. Maybe you can feel it. Maybe its coming from you.

Speaking of the void, dear listeners, it may or may not be oozing black goo. The goo is very slippery and slightly acidic so watch your step. Beautiful, perfect, brilliant Carlos and his team of scientists are trying to get a sample of the goo. They have not yet reported anything about the goo expect that its best to stay indoors and just avoid the void. I'm sure they will update us if anything new develops.

The Great Pumpkin has been spotted in the desert. A group of Night Vale children barely managed to escape. The Great Pumpkin is a large pumpkin, 10 feet tall, very round and rotting. It has fearsome glowing eyes devoid of hope. We do not know where it got the eyes from as pumpkins do not have eyes. Especially not eyes like that, so cold and yet so familiar. It should be easy enough to spot, but just in case avoid the smell of rotting pumpkin. And do not listen to words it spews in an language captivating but unknown to us.

In other new John Peters- you know the farmer?- has reported his scarecrow missing. If you have stolen his scarecrow for whatever reason, whether it be for an ill humoured joke or some nefarious plot please return it. If the scarecrow has gained sentient life and is walking around, do not approach it. Go back to your home and let the Sheriff's Secret Police deal with it.

I have some notices to read out for you, listeners. The Glow Cloud has announced that his kid is planning on trick-or-treating but still unsure of what to wear. Ideas for a costume are welcome. Perhaps something truly terrifying like a rabbit is the way to go. I certainly hope that the Glow Cloud's child doesn't skip over Old Woman Josie's house. The angels are helping her hand out treats this year. She has candy apples, fresh blood stone lollies and if your lucky you just might get a slice of her home made pumpkin pie, its light on the bones.

The Sheriff's Secret Police would like to remind anyone who finds themselves in the desert tonight that the Great Pumpkin is not carrying any presents. It does not even have hands. Whoever spread that silly rumour should turn themselves in immediately.

There is a costume contest being held near the dog park. Not that the dog park exists. Do not think about the dog park. The prize is a bag full of something. Possibly candy, hopefully not rabbits. It seems to be a very heavy bag.

You are floating, aimlessly floating with your eyes firmly closed. You do not know how you got this way. When you open your eyes you see a light, maybe several lights. It is beautiful. Suddenly you are falling. This ad is brought to you by Walmart.

And now for traffic. Hmm, slow day today listeners so day. Whoa, way too fast! Way too fast and erratic, like some unseen force is chasing them. The yellow bug is going at a much more pleasant speed, keeping up with the moving lights from up head. There was a green car but it seems to have disappeared, taking its passengers with it.

And now the weather."

[(You're my heart's desire; I love you) Nellie Dean by Henry W. Armstrong]*

"Welcome back listeners.

The green car has reappeared near the Public Library. It nearly crashed into it. The passengers do not know what happened. They do not know anything. One of them, a tall dark haired woman, started crying. She does not know why she started to cry. They are all very confused.

The void has stopped oozing. Some can still hear the scratching noises allegedly coming from it. The City Council has not stated what it plans to do to clean up the black goo that is sizzling and burning. Carlos, beautiful wonderful Carlos still thinks that the goo is a problem. He thinks that its best to avoid walking into it, especially now that it has started to bubble.

The Glow Cloud's child has won the costume contest. It terrified everyone with its rabbit costume. Its humbling to know that the Glow Cloud's protégée may not have listened to my show and taken my advice. Bats flew out of the bag, after it was opened. They all flew right and left our friendly desert community for some unknown location. There was indeed candy in the bag so everything worked out for the best.

Its been a pleasure spending this Hallow's Eve with you listeners. Good night, Night Vale. Good night."

* * *

Proverb of the Day: do not walk in front of me. Do not walk behind me. Just run! Run very fast. Don't give it a chance to gain on you.

* * *

I hope this is okay. Its my first Night Vale fic. Should I change the proverb? I hope I didn't use one that was used on the podcast.

*I couldn't find a song that actually suits the usual weather. If someone has a recommendation I might change this song. Its in the public domain by the way. Sorry I didn't include the lyrics.


End file.
